4:48 Chapter 5
Having escaped the initial meeting, the later was easier. Su QingYan didn't have to go where He Shu was. Fortunately, the two people were not in the same department. In the end, Su QingYan didn't have to work hard.
However, Su QingYan also had a question. According to Zero, this only happened because he and He Shu become a couple. Then it's enough as long as he doesn't confess to He Shu. So why? Why should he avoid him?
[Because He Shu loves you, only he doesn't show it.] Zero responded to Su QingYan's question. Specifically.
In fact, Su QingYan didn't believe that He Shu loved him when he knew that 98 of his deaths were related to He Shu. He felt that maybe the 98 worlds were his wishful thinking. Fortunately, he was in this world. No longer wishful thinking.
[You must not fall in love with him in this world. Do you understand?] Said Zero.
"Of course." Su QingYan replied, "According to what you said that because I didn't have friends, He Shu just happened to be there for me. Later I would love him. But now it won't be like that. I wouldn’t know He Shu. Secondly, I already had you talking to me."
[So... you are quite serious about me.]
"Naturally." It's hard to have a man who is willing to talk and will never leave him.
If Zero has an entity, Su QingYan will be able to see Zero being shy.
Su QingYan's roommate recently discovered that Su QingYan was not quite right. He was always in a daze and occasionally giggled. Didn't know what to do.
They think that Su QingYan is either in love or stupid. The former is very unlikely, so it should be the stupid one.
Su QingYan naturally doesn't know what his roommate thinks about him. Still, it doesn't matter even if he knows it. He doesn't care what others think of him. It's enough to be happy.
On one occasion, Zero asked him: [QingYan, why don't you talk to other people, what about your other friends? ]
"There is no other friends ah. "
[Why? I don't think your character is very unappealing.]
"Maybe it's because I had depression in high school. Although it's good now, I still don't like to associate with other people, and they don't think much of me. "
[Actually, I think you can try to communicate more with others, so you will not be alone.]
"It doesn't matter," Su QingYan replied. "Aren't you still here?" He is satisfied with Zero talking to him.
[But I'm just something that exists in your mind. I can't appear in front of you, nor is it physically.]
"It's okay, and..." Su QingYan silent for a moment and said, "I always feel that, in fact, you can let me see. It's just like holographic projection, that kind of thing that I can see but cannot touch. Don't you agree?"
[Why do you think so? ]
"Intuition."
Well, that's true, he never mentioned it to Su QingYan before, and Su QingYan never notices. After all, in Su QingYan's whole mind is He Shu.
"Well, can I see what you look like?" Su QingYan became more and more curious.
[Sorry, no. ] Zero simply refused.
"Why?" Su QingYan was very disappointed.
[No reason.] Zero's tone sounds a bit serious.
"That..." Su QingYan thought for a moment and opened up a condition. "If I successfully live in this world, can you show me what you look like?"
Zero thought for a while. He replied, [OK...]
Su QingYan smiled. He should live well so he could see Zero. He believes that as long as he doesn't have any contact with He Shu, he surely will survive.
Since Zero came to his side, Su QingYan felt like he was the hero of the novel he had just opened. When he couldn’t pass sports exam, he would receive some guidance. If he couldn't do the General Exam, he could ask Zero in his mind. Of course, except for psychology. Don't know why but what Zero is good seems only those subjects that are common, such as English, math, etc. As for psychology, it still relying on Su QingYan himself.
In this case, Su QingYan is very grateful to Zero, after all, Zero has helped him so much.
Don't know whether it was because of Zero teaching that the image of Su QingYan began to change gradually, not his long-term change, but his temperament. Now he is willing to lift his head and smile.
Su QingYan himself looks good, and after the change, this naturally attracts the attention of the opposite sex.
One day on junior year, Zero suddenly reminded Su QingYan to pay attention to his image that day, dressed better and comb his hair before going out.
"Am I missing something?" Asked Su QingYan.
[Don't ask, just do it.] Said Zero.
So Su QingYan did so, put on the most decent set of clothes in his cabinet, and combed through his hair that he had slept in miscellaneously.
There aren't many classes today, only a class in the morning and the rest is in the afternoon. Su QingYan plans to go back to the dormitory after having lunch outside. But he was stopped in the middle of the road.
It was a girl who stopped him. Su QingYan saw that she felt familiar at first sight, but he couldn't remember where he had seen, nor did he know her name.
The girl looked a bit shy and dared to look at Su QingYan with a slight blush. She stared down at her toes with her head down and said, "Hello."
"Hello there."
"What's going on here?" Su QingYan asked Zero.
[Confessing. ]
"Confess? "
[Yeah, this girl told you that she like you for ninety-eight times and rejected. Don't refuse her this time.]
No wonder that Zero make him dress up well today, Su QingYan looks at the shy girl in front of him and not saying anything.
"Well, do you have a girlfriend?" the girl asked cautiously.
"No." Su QingYan answered truthfully. When the girls heard the answer, she smiled. However, Su QingYan's next words made her laugh over.
"Because I don't like girls." Su QingYan answered seriously.
Then the news of Su QingYan was a homo spread in the school. The students around him looked at him more or less with some curiosity and contempt.
Sometimes Su QingYan hears conversations from the surrounding male students:
"Oh, I heard he was the one."
"Oh, I don't think there will be an idea on us."
"I still have a room with him. I feel very dangerous. If I don't speak, I would like to change my room."
I won't even look at you if I wanted to. Su QingYan thought that these people were utterly sad to some degree, to think people are very desperate. He also didn't care about the rumors. Before any rumors spread out, those people couldn't get along with him. After rumors spread out, they looked down on him more.
[QingYan, I think you did something wrong this time.]
"What's wrong?"
[Because of your openness, your reputation is damaged. ]
"It's okay. I'm telling the truth. "
[But you didn't fall in love with He Shu in this world. How did you know you were gay? ]
"I don't know..." Su QingYan didn't know either. There was such a feeling that he was inexplicably not interested in girls. He liked boys more. He thought about it and asked, "Yes, is Zero a boy?"
[Yes. ]
Sure enough, it's a boy. Su QingYan felt happy.
Fortunately, Su QingYan didn't do any compelling thing at ordinary times, so his rumors didn't circulate for a long time and settled. However, the male students around still alienated him. Su QingYan nevertheless doesn't take them back.
The days passed indifferently. Su QingYan lived a life of three points a day. Every morning and evening, he will have a good conversation with Zero. When eating, he asked about Zero's taste since Su QingYan found that Zero could felt what he eat. Zero was not a picky eater, but he always told him not to eat something unclean or unhealthy.
At the senior year, many students began to think about the work that followed. Su QingYan wanted to be a teacher. He had decided it since childhood. But listening to Zero's description, he used to be a teacher in the past world, and He Shu was also a teacher. Su QingYan was worried about being in the same school as him.
So Su QingYan decided to ask for Zero's opinion first.
"Zero, what do you think I should do in the future?"
[It's alright to follow your ideas.]
"Is it teacher? However, I am afraid to meet He Shu again. "
[Rest assured, no, this world will never be.] Zero said with affirmation.
You are quite sure, Su QingYan thought. In the end, he decided to be a teacher. Since he was studying psychology, he decided to become a teacher in the psychology department. When he completed the career plan, he also ran to the Department of Foreign Languages and listened to He Shu's friend. He was relieved that he didn't have to deal with the other person when he learned that his plan was a translator.
"He doesn't plan to become a teacher, you truly mean it!" Su QingYan is very excited.
[So, just trust me later.]
"Uh, er, say if you are a real person." Su QingYan was at loss.
[Why do you say that. ]
"In this way, I can communicate with you in a fair manner and become a friend. Instead of talking in my mind, hiding like a thief."
[Actually, you don't have to think so. At least I'm only one for you now, isn't it? ]
Right. If Zero is a real person, then I'm afraid it others will like him too. Then it won't be good for him.
"Yes, Zero, I think, can I listen to your real voice? Not this cold voice." Su QingYan thinks that Zero should have the original voice. This cold voice doesn't fit Zero at all.
[sure.] The cold voice disappeared. Instead, it was a magnetic male voice.
However, Su QingYan also had a question. According to Zero, this only happened because he and He Shu become a couple. Then it's enough as long as he doesn't confess to He Shu. So why? Why should he avoid him?
[Because He Shu loves you, only he doesn't show it.] Zero responded to Su QingYan's question. Specifically.
In fact, Su QingYan didn't believe that He Shu loved him when he knew that 98 of his deaths were related to He Shu. He felt that maybe the 98 worlds were his wishful thinking. Fortunately, he was in this world. No longer wishful thinking.
[You must not fall in love with him in this world. Do you understand?] Said Zero.
"Of course." Su QingYan replied, "According to what you said that because I didn't have friends, He Shu just happened to be there for me. Later I would love him. But now it won't be like that. I wouldn’t know He Shu. Secondly, I already had you talking to me."
[So... you are quite serious about me.]
"Naturally." It's hard to have a man who is willing to talk and will never leave him.
If Zero has an entity, Su QingYan will be able to see Zero being shy.
Su QingYan's roommate recently discovered that Su QingYan was not quite right. He was always in a daze and occasionally giggled. Didn't know what to do.
They think that Su QingYan is either in love or stupid. The former is very unlikely, so it should be the stupid one.
Su QingYan naturally doesn't know what his roommate thinks about him. Still, it doesn't matter even if he knows it. He doesn't care what others think of him. It's enough to be happy.
On one occasion, Zero asked him: [QingYan, why don't you talk to other people, what about your other friends? ]
"There is no other friends ah. "
[Why? I don't think your character is very unappealing.]
"Maybe it's because I had depression in high school. Although it's good now, I still don't like to associate with other people, and they don't think much of me. "
[Actually, I think you can try to communicate more with others, so you will not be alone.]
"It doesn't matter," Su QingYan replied. "Aren't you still here?" He is satisfied with Zero talking to him.
[But I'm just something that exists in your mind. I can't appear in front of you, nor is it physically.]
"It's okay, and..." Su QingYan silent for a moment and said, "I always feel that, in fact, you can let me see. It's just like holographic projection, that kind of thing that I can see but cannot touch. Don't you agree?"
[Why do you think so? ]
"Intuition."
Well, that's true, he never mentioned it to Su QingYan before, and Su QingYan never notices. After all, in Su QingYan's whole mind is He Shu.
"Well, can I see what you look like?" Su QingYan became more and more curious.
[Sorry, no. ] Zero simply refused.
"Why?" Su QingYan was very disappointed.
[No reason.] Zero's tone sounds a bit serious.
"That..." Su QingYan thought for a moment and opened up a condition. "If I successfully live in this world, can you show me what you look like?"
Zero thought for a while. He replied, [OK...]
Su QingYan smiled. He should live well so he could see Zero. He believes that as long as he doesn't have any contact with He Shu, he surely will survive.
Since Zero came to his side, Su QingYan felt like he was the hero of the novel he had just opened. When he couldn’t pass sports exam, he would receive some guidance. If he couldn't do the General Exam, he could ask Zero in his mind. Of course, except for psychology. Don't know why but what Zero is good seems only those subjects that are common, such as English, math, etc. As for psychology, it still relying on Su QingYan himself.
In this case, Su QingYan is very grateful to Zero, after all, Zero has helped him so much.
Don't know whether it was because of Zero teaching that the image of Su QingYan began to change gradually, not his long-term change, but his temperament. Now he is willing to lift his head and smile.
Su QingYan himself looks good, and after the change, this naturally attracts the attention of the opposite sex.
One day on junior year, Zero suddenly reminded Su QingYan to pay attention to his image that day, dressed better and comb his hair before going out.
"Am I missing something?" Asked Su QingYan.
[Don't ask, just do it.] Said Zero.
So Su QingYan did so, put on the most decent set of clothes in his cabinet, and combed through his hair that he had slept in miscellaneously.
There aren't many classes today, only a class in the morning and the rest is in the afternoon. Su QingYan plans to go back to the dormitory after having lunch outside. But he was stopped in the middle of the road.
It was a girl who stopped him. Su QingYan saw that she felt familiar at first sight, but he couldn't remember where he had seen, nor did he know her name.
The girl looked a bit shy and dared to look at Su QingYan with a slight blush. She stared down at her toes with her head down and said, "Hello."
"Hello there."
"What's going on here?" Su QingYan asked Zero.
[Confessing. ]
"Confess? "
[Yeah, this girl told you that she like you for ninety-eight times and rejected. Don't refuse her this time.]
No wonder that Zero make him dress up well today, Su QingYan looks at the shy girl in front of him and not saying anything.
"Well, do you have a girlfriend?" the girl asked cautiously.
"No." Su QingYan answered truthfully. When the girls heard the answer, she smiled. However, Su QingYan's next words made her laugh over.
"Because I don't like girls." Su QingYan answered seriously.
Then the news of Su QingYan was a homo spread in the school. The students around him looked at him more or less with some curiosity and contempt.
Sometimes Su QingYan hears conversations from the surrounding male students:
"Oh, I heard he was the one."
"Oh, I don't think there will be an idea on us."
"I still have a room with him. I feel very dangerous. If I don't speak, I would like to change my room."
I won't even look at you if I wanted to. Su QingYan thought that these people were utterly sad to some degree, to think people are very desperate. He also didn't care about the rumors. Before any rumors spread out, those people couldn't get along with him. After rumors spread out, they looked down on him more.
[QingYan, I think you did something wrong this time.]
"What's wrong?"
[Because of your openness, your reputation is damaged. ]
"It's okay. I'm telling the truth. "
[But you didn't fall in love with He Shu in this world. How did you know you were gay? ]
"I don't know..." Su QingYan didn't know either. There was such a feeling that he was inexplicably not interested in girls. He liked boys more. He thought about it and asked, "Yes, is Zero a boy?"
[Yes. ]
Sure enough, it's a boy. Su QingYan felt happy.
Fortunately, Su QingYan didn't do any compelling thing at ordinary times, so his rumors didn't circulate for a long time and settled. However, the male students around still alienated him. Su QingYan nevertheless doesn't take them back.
The days passed indifferently. Su QingYan lived a life of three points a day. Every morning and evening, he will have a good conversation with Zero. When eating, he asked about Zero's taste since Su QingYan found that Zero could felt what he eat. Zero was not a picky eater, but he always told him not to eat something unclean or unhealthy.
At the senior year, many students began to think about the work that followed. Su QingYan wanted to be a teacher. He had decided it since childhood. But listening to Zero's description, he used to be a teacher in the past world, and He Shu was also a teacher. Su QingYan was worried about being in the same school as him.
So Su QingYan decided to ask for Zero's opinion first.
"Zero, what do you think I should do in the future?"
[It's alright to follow your ideas.]
"Is it teacher? However, I am afraid to meet He Shu again. "
[Rest assured, no, this world will never be.] Zero said with affirmation.
You are quite sure, Su QingYan thought. In the end, he decided to be a teacher. Since he was studying psychology, he decided to become a teacher in the psychology department. When he completed the career plan, he also ran to the Department of Foreign Languages and listened to He Shu's friend. He was relieved that he didn't have to deal with the other person when he learned that his plan was a translator.
"He doesn't plan to become a teacher, you truly mean it!" Su QingYan is very excited.
[So, just trust me later.]
"Uh, er, say if you are a real person." Su QingYan was at loss.
[Why do you say that. ]
"In this way, I can communicate with you in a fair manner and become a friend. Instead of talking in my mind, hiding like a thief."
[Actually, you don't have to think so. At least I'm only one for you now, isn't it? ]
Right. If Zero is a real person, then I'm afraid it others will like him too. Then it won't be good for him.
"Yes, Zero, I think, can I listen to your real voice? Not this cold voice." Su QingYan thinks that Zero should have the original voice. This cold voice doesn't fit Zero at all.
[sure.] The cold voice disappeared. Instead, it was a magnetic male voice.
***
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Huh...is Zero, He Shu?
ReplyDeleteStill it feels sad how these lovebirds are parting by never meeting.
If he just told He Shu, could he have been saved?
I think so too. Maybe he felt utterly guilty because of his cousin so he decided to save him. Even if it means not being with him.
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